


August

by origamigf



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Canon Compliant, Friends With Benefits, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, No Strings Attached, One Night Stands, Post-Timeskip, Songfic, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-30
Updated: 2020-11-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:20:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27805972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/origamigf/pseuds/origamigf
Summary: One drunk question, one sober answer, and one exchange.
Relationships: Miya Atsumu/Sakusa Kiyoomi
Kudos: 31





	August

He’s burning hot with something. Maybe it’s anger. Or perhaps, it’s a raging desire. He doesn’t know the answer and that scares him a little. It’s a risk, an uncalculated one at that. He doesn’t know if it’ll work or not, he doesn’t know if this will end in distratious agony or blissful rapture. He has to commit to find out. That’s what is terrifying to him. 

“Omi-kun,” Brown eyes stare down at him, a light teasing tone pouring out of that annoying tone of Atsumu’s as he calls his name. “Are ya sure ya wanna do this? Ya seem like the type to y’know…” 

He stares back at him, raising a brow. He eggs him on, “The type to what exactly?” 

“Um...be more professional?” He sounds like an idiot saying that when they’re sitting on his bedroom with Atsumu’s fingers fiddling at the bottom of his shirt. He’s hesitating, something new that he’s never seen him do before. Maybe this stupid side quest will be worth it in the end, at least he got that out of it. 

“Professional?” Sakusa asks with a dead manner. “As in, not sleeping with co-workers?” 

“Yeah!” Atsumu smiles tightly, looking like a nervous buffon. He almost lets out a chuckle. How would have thought that he would be the more nervous one here? 

Sakusa sighs, “It’s sex at the end of the day, no strings attatched right?After all, it’s only once. You were the one who approached me, weren’t you?” 

“I was drunk!” Atsumu whined embarrassingly, frowning. It’d be cute if he hadn’t said that sentence. 

“So you’re saying you wouldn’t be interested in me sober?” Sakusa asks, “If that’s the case, I’ll take my leave. I have no interest in an intoxicated sexual exchange.” 

“What! No, that’s not - ugh, why are you so mean?” He whined again, he was getting really annoying and they’ve barely even moved an inch since they landed on the bed. “I just...wouldn’t ask you normally. Ya know, I was...inhibited!” 

This conversation is getting nowhere. 

“You mean you were scared to ask?” Sakusa smirks, “What? Were you intimidated by me or something?”

Atsumu’s face grows hotter and brighter before him. Another bonus of this potentially horrible decision. 

“And what if I was? It’s not exactly like yer the most friendly guy, Omi-kun!” 

“Point taken,” Sakusa has to agree, but he’s never seen much joy in kissing everyone’s asses, hoping they’ll like him just because of that. He’s no Bokuto who can smile on for hours and have endless hours of chatting with immense joy running through every word he says. Just being around the team for a mere hour can be incredibly draining sometimes and that’s just because some of the members can be so forthcoming in their friendliness. “However, you’re overthinking this, Miya.” 

“Am I?” Atsumu huffs, rolling his eyes. 

“What exactly is the matter?” 

“I just…” Atsumu blushes, “Never have I ever before done somethin’ like this…” 

“In general?” Sakusa knows before he even asks by the way Atsumu is fidgeting and he can tell this is a mistake. This was such a stupid decision. He should have blown Atsumu off, he should have rolled his eyes and walked away. He shouldn’t have approached him the next day after escorting him home from their drinking outing and pushed further. “Or just done this sort of exchange?”

“In general.” Atsumu’s words are sharp and tense. His body follows suit, his shoulders growing tight and his fingers curling tighter around the hem of his shirt, tugging on it a little. 

The whisper of his uncertainty and the way his eyes have gone from utter confidence to embarrassment has turned something inside of Sakusa. There’s a small little flame, a match that was kept long unlit inside him that has been dragged across the box with every little thing he does. As the seconds tick by, everything grows hotter and bigger, taking him over. This feeling, what is it? 

He doesn’t know what it is but he knows it’s one hell of a mistake. 

He grasps Atsumu gently by wrists, letting his touch linger there. “Me neither.” 

There’s a deep silence as Atsumu locks eyes with Sakusa as they both come to a better understanding of what this is and what it’ll fester into as they continue on this path. On this stupid, dangerous path that has them swerving and landing on the edge of the cliff. The anxiety would be suffocating normally but now it’s ruining them in such a horrifying beautiful way as it tears them apart inside. 

Fingers are rough and slow, they grip and they pull. Their touch lingers pn each other with the silence running through the small bedroom in this stupid, crammed apartment. Nails are rougher but teeth are more painful and neither has any idea of what they’re doing or how this is supposed to work. They’re lost and they’re experimenting with great ambition as they open their body up to the other. 

Everything is raw and everything is new, but what kills Sakusa the most is how familiar he wishes this was. He hates the thoughts that flood through him, that bring him to tears. Memories he doesn’t have start to form in his mind of spending days in this bed, letting himself become used to Atsumu’s touches and unshakable warmth. He wants to take him back to his place, to see how much it differs against his woven sheets and underneath his favorite quilt he’s held on for years. He wonders what it would be like to kiss Atsumu without this fiery endeavor burning underneath their skin, like they couldn’t get enough because they can’t because once it’s done, it’s over. There’s nothing more of this summer fling after it’s over.

The only thing that will rock through either of them afterward will be regret, grief, and the dull ache of where they once were together in each other’s arms. 

This was such a fucking mistake. 

Why did he have to want more of Atsumu Miya? Of all people? 

It was one stupid question. One dumb drunken question that spilled out of his alcohol-plastered lips. 

That was all it took for Sakusa to say yes. He was so weak. He’s been yearning for this for weeks, no, that’s a lie. 

He’s been yearning for it ever since that long, long match long ago at the early stages of the Nationals back when Atsumu was nothing but a second-year, noisy setter who managed to accumulate a little fame. The moment he saw his bright smile and flushed cheeks as he announced to the world, ‘I am a setter’ and as he threw himself passionately into the game, he’s been weak to Atsumu’s will because he’s wanted him ever since he saw him so in love with the game like no one else. 

He was entranced and he couldn't escape. It’s suffocating him. That’s why he said yes. 

He’s been yearning for him for  _ years.  _

If he can’t have Atsumu forever, at least, he has him for tonight. 

At least, he knows what could have been if only those brown eyes were glued to him instead of another. 

“Ha, what’s this?” Atsumu says with swallow breaths as he moves closer to Sakusa’s face, gently wiping away the tears that accumulated in his eyes. “Does it hurt? ‘M sorry I didn’t know…”

He throws his arms around Atsumu’s shoulders, drawing him unless their mouths are crashing furiously against each other. “It’s nothing, it’s fine.” 

“If yer sure…” 

This was a mistake because he was so hopelessly in love with Atsumu and has been for fucking years. 

But he got what he wanted. He took a risk and it’s fucking agony living with it as he pants against Atsumu’s rusty sheets, wondering how he managed to find himself in this mess. Who’s to blame? Is it the one fallen for or the person who’s fallen? He’s not sure. 

That’s an existential crisis for another day though. 

He’s had enough. 

He can’t bear to see Atsumu’s cheeky smile, the same one that made him fall so desperately in love when they were both so much younger and barely could even remember each other’s names, as he says, “‘m not so bad, huh!” 


End file.
